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If the Internet is good for anything—and, actually, it’s good for lots of things—it’s good for finding a needle in a haystack. Whether you’re hankering after a pistol grip for that vintage Hasselblad single reflex camera, or want to learn all the lyrics to R.E.M.’s “It’s the End of the World as We Know it,” the World Wide Web has made tracking down and securing even the most obscure objects your heart desires a lot easier.

Yet, when it comes to online matters of the heart, finding “the one” often remains elusive. That’s because love, like the Internet, has a lingo and etiquette all its own. Combining the two in an online dating scenario can complicate the delicate dance even further.

Once it was: “Boy meets Girl,” and, depending on circumstance, “Boy gets (or does not get) Girl.” Now, it’s Boy posts profile. Girl posts profile. Profile does or does not pique interest. Maybe Boy and Girl meet—or maybe they don’t, and if they do, do Boy and Girl live up to their profiles and live happily ever after?

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