There are numerous self-help books for dealing with anger available online. Most people can identify their own problems, although they lack the ability to follow-through with changing themselves; that s why there are psych counselors (who cannot cure, but they can provide guidance in methods proven effective for others). Behavior comes down to habit, change your habits to change yourself. Thinking positively about one’s self and doing what needs to be done (particularly when it is hard to do) can go a long way, and thinking positive thoughts is more effective than trying to suppress negative thoughts. It has been proven that even fake laughter triggers a biochemical reaction in the brain that positively alters one’s perspective. Research indicates that realistic/pessimistic individuals usually have a better grasp on reality. However, one s attitude may be self-defeating or self-reinforcing, the psychological concept of the self-fulfilling prophesy indicates that our expectations subconsciously affect our behavior, either by their positive effects (from a positive attitude) or negative effects (from a negative attitude that undermines the will to win). It has been empirically proven that acting as if one is happy can be a method of being more positive in their life. It has been proven that even fake laughter triggers a biochemical reaction in the brain that positively alters one’s perspective. Thinking positively about one’s self and doing what needs to be done (particularly when it is hard to do) can go a long way toward being successful; and, thinking positive thoughts is more effective than trying to suppress negative thoughts. Psych research in happiness indicates that achieving a goal seldom results in sustained happiness. Research also indicates that hope and optimism are key to success in life, and that genuine pride in success/accomplishments can evoke happiness. Dissatisfaction with life results from dwelling on past negative events, and insufficient appreciation and savoring of past positive events. See: Seligman, “Authentic Happiness: Using the New Positive Psychology to Realize Your Potential for Lasting Fulfillment;” there are several questionnaires at http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/Default.aspx. From the web site: “Positive psychology interventions can also lastingly decrease depression symptoms.” Establishing a habit to replace a habit that is the result of many years of practice is very difficult, particularly if it involves behavior that has become a character trait. If you start slow and gradually increase you will have a better chance of making it a habit. Of course, it will take 3 weeks or more to establish a replacement habit, and longer if it involves a firmly entrenched trait. During that time period, you have to commit yourself to doing something you don t really want to do. Also, self-absorption is a symptom of depression. Do not underemphasize the effects of exercise, proper diet (minimal sugar, avoid processed and refined foods; seek out whole grains, fruits and vegetables, seeds and nuts), avoiding drugs and alcohol, and adequate sleep (consistent each day and preferably more than 7 hours), which are all essential for optimal physical and mental functioning. And, meditation has been proven to reduce stress (many books are available on the subject). Depression self-help: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_tips.htm Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured. Mark Twain/Samuel Clemens,1835-1910 Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. Carrie Fisher Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame. Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) When angry count to ten before you speak. If very angry, count to one hundred. Thomas Jefferson Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. Thomas Jefferson It is the chiefest point of happiness that a man is willing to be what he is. Desiderius Erasmus (1466-1536) I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I m going to be happy in it. Groucho Marx (1895-1977) A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes. Hugh Downs People are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be. Abraham Lincoln